“The pain makes it true,” Grant sings on “How Many Times You” off his latest release, My Depression is Always Killing Me. For Grant, his music is a life-line for personal salvation. Having dealt with depression and substance abuse throughout his life, each song on this EP offers an insight into Grant’s psyche.
While there’s a lot that Grant wants to come clean about on My Depression is Always Killing Me, he’s also not above slinging mud at those who he feels have done him wrong. On first single, “Melancholia” he seethes, “She’s always leaving me for dead.” Later though, he seems to reconcile those feelings on “Edge of the World”. The song acts an apology of sorts for all the wrongs that has done throughout his life: careless ways, selfishness, anger and his own ego. As the list continues, he finally seeks atonement for the previously doomed relationship, declaring over layered guitars, “I’m sorry for all that has happened.”
While songs like these can offer catharsis for the writer, the question remains whether it can also be gratifying and compelling for the listener. Like his hero Elliott Smith, Grant has created a set that is musically satisfying while generating sympathy. The songs on My Depression is Always Killing Me are well structured, yet moody with choruses that offer release. The production highlights each song’s individual mood and vibe. The mid-tempo rocker “Oceans II” offers a driving drum beat and crunchy guitars, while “Edge of the World” is given a darker shade to highlight its tortured lyrics.
My Depression is Always Killing is a solid EP from an emerging songwriter who uses his music to deal with his demons. Of course, the very things that make it memorable also work against it. Its subject matter makes it hard for repeated listenings. It might be hard for Grant to lighten his mood slightly, but if he did it might be easier to generate more listeners and subsequent replays.
For more information on Grant, check out his web-site. My Depression is Always Trying to Kill Me is out now.
Listen to “Melancholia” below: